Last updated: January 31, 2017 At first, dealing with ADHD is tough. But eventually, you can come to a point where you learn how to thrive with ADHD. This article spills all of the ADHD secrets that just might change your life.
By using the following 7 dirty ADHD secrets in your own life, you’ll be able to unlock your full potential, and hopefully achieve an unbelievably exciting life…
ADHD Secret 1. Know that you’re one of the lucky few
Those people who don’t realize they have ADHD are the ones who spend their entire lives feeling like they are the sole reason for their shortcomings. People who don’t realize they have ADHD will always feel as if they didn’t put in enough effort to be accepted into that one college. Or, they’ll think that if they had only tried a little bit harder, they might not have been such a weirdo during that one job interview (etc.)
So, if you have discovered that you (or your child) are struggling with ADHD, then you are in an amazing place in life. You are an extremely lucky person. I can promise you that.
Because, you are now in a position to not only completely eliminate the guilt associated with your shortcomings. But, you can now also understand that there is a very good reason for what has happened in the past.
- There was a good reason for you being a total screwball (yet probably extremely fun) girl or guy in highschool
- And, there was probably a reason that you didn’t put in nearly as much effort into the things that your classmates seemingly breezed through
- There is also an explanation as to why people called you “slow,” or mentioned other hurtful things to you in an attempt to bring you down
And, it was all because of ADHD. So, if you know that you have ADHD, you can now begin the process of completely relieving yourself of past guilt. Don’t you feel better already?
ADHD Secret 2. Remember that none of this is your fault
There’s probably a reason why you’ve always felt like you were “different” – but just didn’t know why.
Well, the reason why you’ve always felt “different” is probably because of ADHD.
And, none of it is your fault.
But, now you know that there’s no shame in doing embarrassing stuff on occasion, making mistakes at work, feeling “slower” than your peers, or falling victim to whatever brain farts your ADHD causes you.
If you have ADHD, then your brain works a little bit differently than most, and you might even have to adjust how you live your life. But, that’s all part of the experience of living with ADHD. It’s just simply not your fault.
So, please stop feeling like you’re the reason for your shortcomings! Feel free to blame ADHD instead. Just don’t blame yourself. This is what will set you free.
ADHD Secret 3. Stop compensating for weaknesses, and start going “all in” on your strengths
I can’t construct anything worthwhile with my hands, or even assemble a piece of IKEA furniture for that matter.
I also can’t play an instrument.
Nor can I wait tables at restaurants.
In fact, I once tried waiting tables at BJ’s Brewhouse & Grill for a week. And, I was so bad at it that I was messing up everyone’s orders, spilling drinks and causing complete chaos in that restaurant.
My manager basically told me that I was too slow, and just wasn’t cut out to be a waiter.
I could’ve gotten really mad and emotionally upset about all of this. But, I actually thought about it logically, and eventually realized that I just wasn’t meant to wait tables. My ADHD brain didn’t mesh well with the environment, and it didn’t work out for me. No big deal.
My brain style isn’t a good match for plenty of activities, so I don’t waste my time trying to improve on my weaknesses.
But, once you determine what your strengths are (yes, you have at least one amazing strength) then you can come to a place where you almost forget about having ADHD. And, that’s where happiness truly lies in the world of ADHD. It’s where you don’t have to think – because you’re so caught up in the flow of doing something that you’re already great at every single day.
Notice how I didn’t tell you to “follow your passion?”
Not once did I instruct you to “follow your passion and the money will come.”
Yeah, I didn’t mention that bit of mainstream advice because then I’d be lying to you. The truth is that following your passion rarely works when it comes to ADHD (or even in normal, everyday life).
I say this because most people’s passions do not align with their natural-born talents and abilities.
With an ADHD brain style, there are probably strange quirks going on that inhibit you from doing certain things as effectively as most people.
Please know that I am not saying that you should be limited by this. Never. You should obviously still do what you love as a hobby. I’m just saying that in order to truly thrive with ADHD, you should try to improve on your greatest strengths, as that is where you’ll see the most progress, and feel extremely happy (progress is happiness).
ADHD Secret 4. Start to love the things you’re already good at
What’s funny is that people almost always end up becoming passionate about the things they’re already really good at.
See how that works?
Don’t follow your passions. Just follow whatever your natural strengths happen to be, and you’ll almost positively become passionate about that!
Billionaire Mark Cuban agrees with this.
Who isn’t passionate about something that they have a huge competitive advantage in?
I mean, doesn’t that just make sense in a totally logical way?
You absolutely LOVE the feeling of doing whatever it is that you know you can win at, even if you don’t want to mention that publicly. That’s OK. I’ll admit it for you!
For example, I love looking at amazing artwork, but I’ve just never had an artist’s touch. I’m not a painter or drawer. It’s just not me. I stick to writing online, even though I’m not very good at it. But, at least I know that writing is one of my personal strengths.
So, as long as you can determine something that you’re good at, then you are going to be one of the luckiest people to ever live with this disorder.
ADHD Secret 5. Learn to leverage every advantage that you have in life
The unfortunate reality is that many people with ADHD simply “give up,” before ever giving themselves a real chance at succeeding through their strengths.
“But how do I know what I’m truly good at?” is what you might be wondering.
And, the truth is that I honestly don’t know what you’re good at.
But, I promise that there is something that you have a competitive advantage in, that others just can’t keep up with.
It’s going to be up to you to figure out the talents that best align with your natural brain chemistry.
ADHD brains are wacky – so there are going to be certain things that you just won’t be able to pick up on as well as others. This is completely OK. In fact, this is natural! You aren’t a god-like superhuman, although thinking that you are one is definitely so much better than believing that you’re worthless.
I’m just saying that you probably aren’t super-talented in 20 different areas.
But, you do have one or two little things that are undoubtedly amazing talents.
I don’t know many people with ADHD who can’t name at least one or two things that they’re good at. So, I know that if you’re reading this, there’s something awesome that you have going for you.
ADHD Secret 6. You must answer the question “What am I good at?” as honestly as you can
Are you a good speaker? Can you dance, write, sing or play an instrument? Is language your thing? Do you speak French or Portuguese so well that locals think you’re one of them? Are you good with people? Selling products? Finance? Starting businesses?
For some reason, people with ADHD usually turn out to be amazing entrepreneurs. We don’t really like to deal with authority figures, so many of us like to try striking it out on our own. It’s kind of a strange thing – because most people with ADHD either love routine or hate it.
For many of us who can’t stand routine, naturally reject authority, and need to be on our own schedule – building some kind of small business is a great way to live.
What I’m saying is that there is something for you to work with, at the very least.
Once you begin to leverage whatever you’re good at, you can start to play with it more often in your free time.
I understand that you probably “don’t have the time” to leverage your strengths. No one has time.
But, you’ve got to make time.
You have to give yourself at least 30 minutes of time per day to develop your strengths. It doesn’t matter if you have to do this at 5 a.m. or 3 p.m.
The most important thing that you can do when it comes to thriving with ADHD is finding time to persistently work on your strengths.
Because, whatever your good at is seriously going to become one of your greatest assets.
I know that personally – I’ve been terrible at math, chemistry, public speaking, woodworking, basketball, music and so many other things.
But, when it comes to certain (weird) things like writing and building websites, I just can’t get enough of it.
When you find out how to thrive with ADHD through your honest strengths, you will begin to get lost in time. You will stop thinking about all of the areas that you’ve always lacked in. You’ll start to become present to the moment. This will help you live a life that’s worth living.
Just start by working on your greatest strength for 30 minutes per day.
Make this a habit.
That’s what’s most important.
I would rather see a fellow ADHD sufferer work on their strength consistently (once per day) for only 30 minutes – rather than sporadically dedicating 4 hours to their craft once every few weeks.
You have to get persistent at something if you want to thrive with ADHD. I’m not telling you to become persistent at everything. That would be boring. Plus, you have ADHD. You’re not going to make every aspect of your life super regulated. I wouldn’t even recommend living a life like that, anyway!
Practice one thing. Your strength. Once per day. Start by dedicating just 30 minutes to your strength per day. Make it a habit, and work your way up.
That’s the bottom line.
Even if you don’t like doing this at first – I bet you won’t be able to tell me that you aren’t “passionate” about whatever your strength is after only a few weeks of practicing it.
I promise that if you can consistently work on your strength, in 30 minute blocks, once per day – you’ll see INSANE improvements in your life in one month’s time. Just try it, and let me know what happens. But, I’m betting that magical things will happen in your life once you start leveraging your strengths persistently.
ADHD Secrets – How to Thrive Through Your Strengths Conclusion
Overall, I know that this is a long article that jumps around quite a bit.
But, I hope that you’ve at least been able to absorb some of the message here.
If anything, please try to remember these few main takeaways:
- Stop blaming yourself and stressing about your past difficulties that ADHD has caused
- Start to focus on your natural strengths and abilities – as these will take you furthest in life (rather than your passions)
- Develop persistence in at least one area of your life (preferably a strength)
- Be honest about what you really want in life
I truly hope that this article helps you understand the bigger picture of living life with ADHD. I also hope that this article helps you take action, and live a happier and healthier lifestyle with ADHD.